Emotional Blackmail

The saddest thing to deal with is EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL.

I detest that women generally, turn on their TAPS when they don't get what they want.

A guy can't dump his girl without having to don Wellingtons and a double poncho.  The same also applies in the reverse, of course, although not as often.

Today, I had to deal with a colleague, who started her rain parade, because I told her that I was in an eruptive position and therefore, less unforgiving and should be left alone to simmer.

Instead of giving me my space, which is mine and only mine, she decided to take advantage of my hospitality (it was my break time, with my clique) and went on to put her point across about a 16 year old.  My patience was wearing very thin and I repeated myself - I need space to cool down, so please don't ask this boy to present himself in my face, because I am not his Mother and I am certainly no Mother Teresa, and it will be in his best interest to stay away from me.

She started to ball her eyes out.

Her nose started dripping mucus, and she wiped away her flowing tears like a 6 year old - no Kleenex, just the back of her hand and continued, words interrupted by gasps of air.

Obviously that didn't move me. It irritated me.

In this day and age, how does a mid-20s female, get so emotional over an issue that doesn't even concern her!

I laid it out for her.

If a parent is totally comfortable that her teenager is just GREAT, who is she to beg me to accept his apology?

I accept apologies on my terms, not anyone else's.

I invited her to sit but she refused, saying she had work to do.  Yet, she continued conveying her case to me, for the next 30 minutes.  Wow....if that means, she had work to do, I would like to imagine what having no work to do meant!

So I spelled it out for her.

I AM NOT THAT CHILD'S PARENT.

I AM NOT EVEN HIS SCHOOL TEACHER.

I AM NOT CONNECTED TO HIM IN ANY WAY.

SO I AM THEREFORE NOT INTERESTED IN HIM.

I am a tax payer, like everyone else.

If he's a school-going kid here, using up our tax dollars for subsidised education, then I have a right to ASK the authorities, what we are doing about such individuals, who clearly are not interested in following basic rules, like respecting others and to not waste public resources for his education.

Mostly, children who never learn in school, about discipline and rules, seldom grow up to become contributing citizens, without first having to come to blows with some part of societal norms or breaking some law.  There are exceptions to this, but for the most, youths only really learn, when they are forced by law to.

Some Parents are no longer interested in parenting.  They feel that their responsibility ends, after they have succeeded in applying for financial assistance for their child's meal in school and/or textbooks.  They wash their hands and hope that our efficient government will take care of their failings.

UNFORTUNATELY, our present government always does - and so this cycle can never be broken.  We are stuck, with no possibility of becoming a greater nation because parents fail at parenting.  They need to be able to go for annual vacations, but it's not critical for their child to learn basic manners.

Gone are the days, when Singaporeans work for something to be proud of.  Our efficient government provided us everything, that I'm sure the applications for citizenship has ballooned.

Here I was thinking, US is having a huge immigration headache as debated times over in their GOP.  We apparently also are in the same boat.

People come here so our government can educate their children, teach them manners with no cost to them but all the inconveniences spread among those these delinquents come in contact with.

At the end of the day, WE are poorer in morals, because our own will ask - how come they can do that and we can't?

Did I budge from my stand of DND?

Nope.

I sent her away.

I told her to please respect my personal space and decision, because she is not me and cannot predict what I am capable of doing if she pushes me another inch.  

I also told her, to never be emotionally entangled in matters she has no idea about.  If her work was too overwhelming for her, to kindly not to get that confused with the real matter at hand.