someone for everyone

Is there someone for everyone?

This is the question that pops up everytime we find ourselves in a state of loneliness. Thankfully it's a state, therefore it should be transient. I think the question should not be whether there is someone for us, but whether we have enough coping skills to first, be at peace with ourselves. When we don't, then we find ourselves in this state - but when we do, it's not so much the being alone that will eat us up, it's the inability or our choice of being socially unreacheable on a permanent basis.

I am one such person - who longs for some company, yet unable to bring myself to be totally committed, simply because I'm not prepared to shed a tear and I have lost my ability to be patient. Unless we are discussing my relationship with non-human animals, there is no such thing as patience in my vocabulary.

As I meet single women, who are older than me, I find them to be so dedicated to their task, whatever it may be. They are adaptive and doing well yet we are quite likely to pick them out. It could be because they are all impatient like me and are more achievement focused. They tend to be strong and able to hold their own - curt and direct.

I wonder why this is so. Does being alone cause a person to be like this, because it seems to be so across the board. There is nothing socially inept about them, it's just that they are more together where work is concerned and they dare speak their minds, as opposed to others in permanent relationships who tend to balance their thoughts according to who is in the audience.

There is no good or bad in this, just that perhaps, when we are accustomed to being in a relationship, we tend to take into account another person's opinions before reconstructing and verbalising ours. I have not really looked deeply into it, but perhaps this is so. Those not in a relationship would have given thought to any opinion to be expressed just differently.

so perhaps there is someone for everyone - and for those who do not, it's because their someone is themselves. They choose to depend on themselves and because they do, they are more sure-footed than those who rely on little boosts from people around them. so there is someone for everyone, just not the way we think it is.