Although my greatest weakness is 'being affected' by comments from close friends, I usually get over it after a while - but that would mean days of being preoccupied, days of online gaming, days of just doing nothing but dwelling. When it affects me very badly, I become dysfunctional - because i have been clinically depressed for too long - a condition my close-knit friends are familiar with.
It has not been a year free of emotional, psychological stress - and looking back, I have done what I could to manage my state of mind and still function. I cannot say that I have survived, since I still wake up depressed and I still have trouble sleeping right through the night. To add fuel to the fire, my gf E, hasn't been very helpful at all. She hides behind the persona of being genuine and sincere when giving me her 2-cents worth of comments - what kind of friend does that, especially when she is copied on every facet of my life? I use to always tell myself that she means well, yet this year, in particular, is making it more difficult and I'm tending toward thinking that she's unhappy herself and using my unfortunate situation to make herself feel better.
That is not being a friend, because she does damage to others to feel good.
I am right now, not strong enough mentally to deal with her and have a sense of being trapped because she keeps herding me in the wrong direction.
I will do the unthinkable - stay away from her.
I will have to be selfish for myself - 20 years of friendship or not - I need to take a leave of absence from this friendship.
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