Don't Compromise

We spend a great part of our lives looking for someone we think we can spend many years with. To say, 'til death do us part' is a bit too cliche for me. We make sacrifices, we try to adapt, we go beyond the necessary to convince ourselves that THIS IS THE ONE. 20 years on, what happens?
To put it in a nutshell, I don't believe in automatic happy endings, because I have always believed in myself and only me. My mother was a phone hogger, and I grew up with a step-father who couldn't careless if we ever had a decent conversation because he was busy gambling. By a stroke of chance, I grew up with a set of ethics that came out of weekly cathecism classes and just by feel. I didn't have a role model to admire, nor did I ever had sit-down dinners in the evenings to wind down the day.
For that reason, I always believe that whatever we are INSIDE cannot be easily manipulated - because it's who we are. Perhaps, that's the reason I could never find anyone who is ideal for me. I'm too complicated and very unorthodox in how I approach situations. I have expectations that even people don't have for themselves. The best part about me is : I am self-sufficient ; emotionally and intellectually. I do not have the need to belong to anyone, any group or any thing.
For this reason, I should have never tried to be like everyone else i.e. get into a relationship and try to believe myself to be like most. I am not.
I know many who are able to stay with one spouse for years on and still have that attachment. Long-term relationships are meant for those who are patient, forgiving and accepting. I am none of the listed. The sooner we understand ourselves, the better the outcome will be, because for the past 20 years, I have been trying to normalise and it just gets worse. I am more unhappy now than I was 5 years ago, and goodness, dare I compare that to 10years back?

Sometimes we think we need someone, because the thrill of being with someone is 'exciting'. BUT seriously, how exciting is having differences of opinion till it runs into pages!!? Too much of anything becomes a chore and a pain. When we want something for whatever reason, we cut corners and make exceptions. Think years later, with added responsibilities, pressures, recurrances of disagreed behaviours; exceptions would not be our priority anymore - it's annoying.
Perhaps I'm not part of the many who would walk behind the shadows of anyone and keep the peace to 'save face'. Nope. To me, 'saving face' is about what I can live with, not what other people can live with; because if I can't live with myself, then why bother about what others think?

Bottom Line: Don't sacrifice your ideals because you want to keep the peace - do it because it's right - People don't change - and you don't want to be like me - wake up some years later and then it hits you - shit - I have compromised beyond my limit.