there isn't just one way

How does someone accumulate so much of anger and disappointment?

A 13-yr old girl who's at the start of puberty and raging hormones probably would do this in a massive way - but it really isn't healthy. We certainly cannot blame anyone for this, but mother nature. Perhaps in the next evolution of man, mother nature may wish to organise puberty to happen slowly, over a longer period of time for the person who's experiencing it, to cope with the confusion.

But the more confusing part of this problem is when we realise that this affects girls more than boys. Boys tend to be less emotional and less inwardly directed. Girls tend to take everything to heart and be unpleasant. Mother nature needs to achieve a more balanced way to fix this.

This 13-year old is laden with disappointments, but if she doesn't learn how to cope with them, she won't make it in the real world, simply because in the real world everyone is a disappointment, everything is a disappointment. We make do and do what we can. It doesn't mean we don't do our best.

There is no solution for us, if we are going to stagnate - we can only bail ourselves out. 13 is a very impressionable age, yet it's the start of important years - years when we build our strength and find ourselves. To give up and internalise is not the way to go and perhaps that's where parents come in. But not all parents are equipped to deal with it - and those who are equipped may not wish to engage themselves for whatever valid reasons they may have. It's a terrible thing to say, that parents don't wish to engage themselves - but it's true. Sometimes the circumstances are so bad that the parents haven't healed enough to deal with another emotional imbalance - irrespective of whether it's their kid or not. Harsh reality but true.

What society needs are people who have time to help in the healing process - we have ignored the need for real counselors - I'm not talking about those who just put their arms around you when you're balling your eyes out at some tragedy. I'm talking about trained psychologists who operate with a valid book of international ethical standards. This society has grown to be spoon-fed, because we had an educational system that does that for too many years. Kids within that system have become young adults or teenagers who do not think very well - and adding the emotional confusion doesn't make their situation less messy.

How does the educational system get involved?
Well, that is learning isn't it? and if we are drilled to think there only one way, we will be laden with bad news when the real world says, there isn't just one way.