Restlessness is a state of mind. In my case, it's not from having a lack of things to do, but to get everything on the correct priority. This binge eating isn't helping me at all - anyone looking at me wouldn't think I have been loading up with high calorie food - i'm burning up more than chocolates or ice-cream can cope. I have also added cheesecake to the list - which is something I would never pass up no matter what. So, with a feeding menu like this, it's a nutritionists nightmare, but who the hell cares, since that's not my major area of training.
I have taken the christmas tree out the box. It's customary for me to just put it up for a day, before the lights and decorations are hung. It's not some christmas tradition, just that I'm fickle minded about where it should stand - it's never in the same corner because my furniture would have moved too many times over the year leaving different vacant spaces for the tree.
Besides that, no I do not observe any tradition that's related to the season of Advent. Christmas to me is very personal - it's a time for reflection and a time for giving, not necessarily in a material sense. This christmas season, I am going to give my neighbours 10 year old the beginner's lessons on playing the piano. She did ask me, since we've been neighbours for 7 years, but because it's christmas, I'm prepared to do it for free - the child will have a lifelong gift and that to me is what christmas is about. We will eventually perish and at least if I am not able to leave behind a legacy, I could leave behind a gift that would be with that child for the rest of her life. Doesn't matter if who she is, the idea is, she came to me and i'm in a position to provide her that knowledge which she would otherwise have to pay to receive.
I have asked nothing in return, except for them to reciprocate by providing religious lessons for my gf's daughter, who may come to live with me. They have agreed, thankfully, because I'm not a muslim and there is no way I could provide that guidance for this child - so I did pass up on collecting fees for religious education for another child - doesn't make me feel any better psychologically, but if it makes the two girls feel better about themselves, then I did something right for someone.
This is my christmas tradition, and one which lasts throughout the year.
do what you can now because you are able to - and whatever little we contribute, it will come back to us in many other ways. When we make new year resolutions, it's part of the christmas tradition, we keep that for a whole year and we take stock of that, 11mths afterwards, before christmas comes around again.
This is what christmas means to me, have always meant to me and will always mean to me.
For those who do not understand why I am the way I am, they will never understand.
There was no certain point in my life when I decided that christmas should never be about whether we receive a neat little box. I grew up with that idea, from the first time I saw the Nativity set, which must have been too many years ago.
There wasn't a cellini bed or philip stark lamp on that set - christmas began with simplicity and it should be kept that way so that we do not loose track of how the simplest gift is usually the most valuable of them all.
I may not be the best person to explain theology, but I know that a little kindness goes a long way for everyone. In a world where there is so much of pride and hostility - christmas decorations and lights, christmas carols in the malls should remind us that Christmas is not about us but about the next person who needs some light in their otherwise dark world. We should put the twinkle back into another person's eyes, if only for that one day.
That would be the best christmas gift for anyone.
It's not about compensating behaviors, it's about giving.
No comments:
Post a Comment